Interclacker Deprivation in Paris Shock!
So, here I am, back again, all full of the incredible fabulousness of Paris.
I had, of course, hoped to blog and to be in touch whilst I was there. But the wifi on my beautiful little Asus Eeeeeeee laptop just wouldn't work.
Of course, I thought it was me. I just don't do technical, and everything technical knows that. I rang Stephen - who is Half Man Half Computer - and he talked me through a few things. It still didn't work.
So I took my little laptop down to reception, to Snooty Reception Homme.
Here is the moment to drop in, ever so casually, that I was there to work and staying in a really, really posh hotel, the Hotel Concorde St-Lazare. Should you wish to stay there, it costs a mere 400 Euros a night which is something around three hundred and sixteen of our best British pounds, five hundred and forty US dollars. Though you do get a very good breakfast. No, you're right, I wasn't paying. A hotel like that to me is Pearls Before Swine. Even though its lobby is just stunningly beautiful and absolutely huge.
But I just didn't encounter the notorious Parisian snootiness, except in Snooty Reception Homme, who was clearly thinking "Stupid middle-aged Englishwoman, I'm surprised she owns a laptop at all, ye Gods where DID she get those clothes from, Tesco's?" (He'll have been thinking it in French, though, obviously, and was probably right about the clothes).
"Oh, Madame, le wifi eet eeez vairy eeezy."
"Not on my Eeee eeet eez not."
With a competent swoop he pounced on my Eeee and pressed a few buttons with a practised air of competent snootiness. It failed to work.
"Aaah - - il ne marche pas" he said, mightily discomfited. "I am afraid I cannot 'elp you, Madame."
It was vairy nearly worth eet (sorry, I've been hearing that accent rather a lot) just to see his snooty expression replaced by crushed puzzlement. BUT NOT WORTH IT ENOUGH! I WANTED MY INTERCLACKER!
Stephen reckons the hotel's wifi was set up with a mistake in it which meant it only works with Windows. The Eee doesn't have Windows.
So I had an interclacker-free weekend. And this is where I should say never mind, it was good for me, I didn't miss it at all, there's more to life - - - etc.
But of COURSE I missed it! I spent quite a lot of my life just waiting for t'interclacker to be invented and I love it.
Still, Paris did its best to console me by being stunningly beautiful and giving me some really good stories too.
Some of which I'll tell you very soon. Using the interclacker. Hurrah!
I had, of course, hoped to blog and to be in touch whilst I was there. But the wifi on my beautiful little Asus Eeeeeeee laptop just wouldn't work.
Of course, I thought it was me. I just don't do technical, and everything technical knows that. I rang Stephen - who is Half Man Half Computer - and he talked me through a few things. It still didn't work.
So I took my little laptop down to reception, to Snooty Reception Homme.
Here is the moment to drop in, ever so casually, that I was there to work and staying in a really, really posh hotel, the Hotel Concorde St-Lazare. Should you wish to stay there, it costs a mere 400 Euros a night which is something around three hundred and sixteen of our best British pounds, five hundred and forty US dollars. Though you do get a very good breakfast. No, you're right, I wasn't paying. A hotel like that to me is Pearls Before Swine. Even though its lobby is just stunningly beautiful and absolutely huge.
But I just didn't encounter the notorious Parisian snootiness, except in Snooty Reception Homme, who was clearly thinking "Stupid middle-aged Englishwoman, I'm surprised she owns a laptop at all, ye Gods where DID she get those clothes from, Tesco's?" (He'll have been thinking it in French, though, obviously, and was probably right about the clothes).
"Oh, Madame, le wifi eet eeez vairy eeezy."
"Not on my Eeee eeet eez not."
With a competent swoop he pounced on my Eeee and pressed a few buttons with a practised air of competent snootiness. It failed to work.
"Aaah - - il ne marche pas" he said, mightily discomfited. "I am afraid I cannot 'elp you, Madame."
It was vairy nearly worth eet (sorry, I've been hearing that accent rather a lot) just to see his snooty expression replaced by crushed puzzlement. BUT NOT WORTH IT ENOUGH! I WANTED MY INTERCLACKER!
Stephen reckons the hotel's wifi was set up with a mistake in it which meant it only works with Windows. The Eee doesn't have Windows.
So I had an interclacker-free weekend. And this is where I should say never mind, it was good for me, I didn't miss it at all, there's more to life - - - etc.
But of COURSE I missed it! I spent quite a lot of my life just waiting for t'interclacker to be invented and I love it.
Still, Paris did its best to console me by being stunningly beautiful and giving me some really good stories too.
Some of which I'll tell you very soon. Using the interclacker. Hurrah!
posted by Daphne at 7:58 pm
6 Comments:
I hope you had taken a good book with you. I know most books are probably bulkier than your delicious Eeeeeee but I imagine you could read dozens of them in the time you would have spent on t'interclacker, although hopefully the diversions of Paris nearly made up for the lack of world wide web. Glad you are back safe and sound and with stories to tell. I am looking forward to reading about them on t'interclacker.
PS have you tried buying clothes at Sainsbury? They are nearly as good as Tesco.
Grrr! I am jealous. All that luxury! No wonder you didn't call in for a romp with me on my bouncy castle when you visited Sheffield. Clearly you move in higher circles than I can even imagine...
Ruth - - yes, books are good - - but I missed t'interclacker, oh yes.
YP - - yes, it WAS luxury. One of those rare jobs where I find myself thinking "Is this really me, here?" You will have to gold-plate your bouncy castle now if I am to visit it, sadly. One weekend and that's it, it'll be designer clothes all the way - - - well, whoever designs for Tesco's. And Sainsbury's, Ruth.
Mmm... Is it Linux? I hate Windows..
I was going to ask if it was a Mac. I've had connection troubles with my Mac laptop and the hotel 'experts' couldn't help me, not even tech support - I spoke at great length to a very nice young man at 1am once, and he tried hard, but couldn't solve my problem.
In the case of the Mac, you have to go into Preferences and choose a different location, it's as simple as that. Not intuitive, but fairly simple once you know.
Could it have been something like that?
I love the way you yell 'I wanted my Interclacker!' I'd have been just the same! LOL!
Jay, it's not a Mac, it's a cute little laptop called an Asus Eee, and it works with Linux. Sighhhh.
The Shamen sang Eee's are good, and they were right. I'm using one right now. I've swapped from the Linux distro that comes with the Eee to Arch Linux, so can't offer advice directly (well, I can: change to Arch) but I bet someone here can.
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