Thursday, October 09, 2008

Pushy Mother

As I drove to Sheffield for some roleplay work today I heard a piece on Radio Two about some Pushy Mother who has written a book about how to be a Pushy Mother.

What had happened was that her son had applied to Oxford University and, in what she considered to be a great tragedy for the nation, he had been turned down, even though he was very very clever and no doubt knew what a fete is and everything, see my previous post.

He, she admitted, wasn't too bothered and had "moved on". She, however, was gutted. She had learned that other parents knew tricks that she didn't know to get their children into university.

So, having amassed all these cunning tricks, she has put them into a book and I don't know what the title is and I wouldn't tell you anyway because it's a hideous idea. The ones we heard were things like having a mock interview in the kitchen with several relatives and a clock to time it. She tried this on her twin daughters, apparently, and then the relatives gave them feedback and the daughters didn't like it.

Apparently the book tells us lots of free ways that will help - such as applying for courses that aren't too popular - or costly ways - private tuition, bribing the admissions department - - oh, I don't know what else because I found the whole thing ridiculous.

The point was, she was trying to get these two daughters into medical school and was so pushy about it that her husband threatened to leave her. I think that the daughters did get in eventually - - I think I'd stopped listening properly by then.

The point, for me, was that I was working today with a group of young doctors who had been through medical school, and were about to do their final exams after three years' training to be GPs.

They were a great group: intelligent, hard-working, committed. Getting into medical school is one thing: getting through it and then working as a doctor is another. From what Pushy Mother was saying, she was the one who was the keen one, not her daughters. What was she pushing for? To be able to say she has two daughters at medical school? What if they hate it, or aren't very good at it, and leave?

What a disappointment they will be to her then. But perhaps they'll have a better time of it.

8 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Stupid woman. She's clearly in it for her own selfish satisfaction and with no thought for her children's personal welfare.

Gah. Makes me hopping mad. My younger son was so muscular, well-coordinated and bold when he was four or five, I believe he could have been a competitive gymnast. But he simply didn't want to do that, despite the fact that he enjoyed physical exercise. So, to me, no point in pushing him.

1:21 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

By the way, there's an award for you over on my blog! :)

1:33 pm  
Blogger Sandi McBride said...

Hmm...Stage Mothers gone Educational...I hate the idea...how are they going to provide a living for themselves, much less try to care for the aging pushy mother! For heavens sake shove their butts out of the nest and enjoy the rest of your life waiting on the grandchildren!
Congrats on the award from Jay!
Sandi

3:20 pm  
Blogger Babs (Beetle) said...

I HATE pushy mothers!

Hi, I just popped over from Jay's. You live just down the road to me :O)

8:23 pm  
Blogger Yorkshire Pudding said...

You were in Sheffield! You should have come round for some roll play on my bouncy castle Daphne! Very therapeutic for lost ladies from Leeds. Failing that - perhaps a cup of tea.

1:16 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A sad story for sure. You hear about these over-pushy parents. I've read that it's quite common now for parents to organise their children's university from bank accounts through to cars and all the rest of it. Mine did a grand total of sod-all (which is what I wanted), other than accompany to one open day and drive me up there at the start of term, and then again at the end of the year.

9:39 am  
Blogger Kim said...

is it legal to sell a book tell people to bribe the admissions department

and that poor kid, now everyone knows he didnt get in to Oxford, bet hes happy eh.

Poor kid probably went to a university as far away from her as possible to get while still being on the planet

i hate mothers like that, mine was the opposite, didnt even think i would get to university

XxX

10:36 pm  
Blogger Daniel ChĂ©rouvrier said...

L'enfer est pavé de bonnes intentions.
Are pushy mother's desire as innocent and chil benefit oriented ? The answer could be...

8:03 am  

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