In the Department Store
First I tried the Polite Approach:
“Hello, I’d like this, please.”
“Thank you. And can I interest you in taking out one of our storecards today and saving ten percent on your purchases?”
“No, thank you.”
“And are you aware that you can use our storecards in Bodge-it-Quick, Cheapotat, Dodgy Décor and Gubbins Garages?”
“Yes, but I’m not interested, thank you.”
On the next floor I tried the Surly Approach.
“Hello, I’d like this, please.”
“Thank you. And can I interest you in taking out one of our st – “
“Nope.”
“And are you aware th-“
“Yup.”
On the second floor I went for the Explanatory Approach.
“Hello, I’d like this, please. And I’d just like to point out that I am not interested in taking out one of your storecards today and saving ten percent on my purchases, and I’d also like to make you aware that I know that I could, if I so wished, use your storecard in Bodge-it-Quick, Cheapotat, Dodgy Décor and Gubbins Garages. However, this information is of negligible interest to me because I am not interested in taking out one of your storecards.”
“Thank you. And can I interest you in taking out one of our storecards today and sa-“
“Hello? HELLO? May I just ask whether you simply work here or whether they have, perhaps, BOUGHT YOUR SOUL?”
"Yuhwoh?"
Remember the days when assistants in department stores used to ask you about the weather?
“Hello, I’d like this, please.”
“Thank you. And can I interest you in taking out one of our storecards today and saving ten percent on your purchases?”
“No, thank you.”
“And are you aware that you can use our storecards in Bodge-it-Quick, Cheapotat, Dodgy Décor and Gubbins Garages?”
“Yes, but I’m not interested, thank you.”
On the next floor I tried the Surly Approach.
“Hello, I’d like this, please.”
“Thank you. And can I interest you in taking out one of our st – “
“Nope.”
“And are you aware th-“
“Yup.”
On the second floor I went for the Explanatory Approach.
“Hello, I’d like this, please. And I’d just like to point out that I am not interested in taking out one of your storecards today and saving ten percent on my purchases, and I’d also like to make you aware that I know that I could, if I so wished, use your storecard in Bodge-it-Quick, Cheapotat, Dodgy Décor and Gubbins Garages. However, this information is of negligible interest to me because I am not interested in taking out one of your storecards.”
“Thank you. And can I interest you in taking out one of our storecards today and sa-“
“Hello? HELLO? May I just ask whether you simply work here or whether they have, perhaps, BOUGHT YOUR SOUL?”
"Yuhwoh?"
Remember the days when assistants in department stores used to ask you about the weather?
posted by Daphne at 11:15 am
1 Comments:
Try going to a McD's here in the US and asking for a plain and simple burger.......
"Would you like cheese with that?"
"No, and if I had, wouldn't I have asked for it?"
This reply never fazes them as they've heard it zillions of times already but corporate rules dictate that they have to ask every customer if they've suddenly developed altzimers and have forgotten about the very existance of cheese.
We have a friend who is manager of a KFC back in Michigan and she confirmed that they have to ask the customer if they want add-ons that they never requested. Seems it DOES make many people say "oh yes please and thank you for reminding me as I'm only obese and am aiming to be morbidly obese by Thanksgiving"
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