Daylight Throbbery

I read somewhere that you can tell if someone is getting older, because when they sit down they invariably go "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah" with pleasure.

Not me, obviously, oh no. I don't feel older. But now I have a daughter at university (coughs proudly) perhaps I should stop feeling about twenty-one and start being grown up.

There are only two signs of impending grownupness, oh, all right, olderness, that I notice and they are these.

1) Things hurt from time to time in places where I never used to notice that there were things. Like my left hip. It throbs from time to time during the day, probably because I walk unevenly because my other leg had a thrombosis in it years ago and never quite got its act completely together again.

But my left hip! I owned it for years, but paid it no attention: I ignored it and it ignored me. Until the last year or so I never knew it was there. Like my feet: I still pay them no attention. When people talk about foot spas or foot massage I'm hey, stop encouraging my feet to listen to such talk. They are very undemanding and I'd like them to stay that way, don't encourage them.

2) The other sign is PUNS. Did I ask for them? No, I did not. They spring unbidden to my brain with increasing ferocity. Sometimes I have to hide under the table to escape them. Mostly I keep them quiet but sometimes one gets out.

So, that's it for now. But when the time comes that I start looking at clothes labelled Comfy or Cosy and those tartan slippers with zips up the side and a pompom on top, and thinking hey, they're rather attractive - - well, then I will know. Or, more probably, won't. Please tell me. Though my reply to you will probably be "Ssh, I'm watching Heartbeat and it's really exciting this week."