Saturday, August 16, 2008

Doing the Maths and Writing the Lyrics

The new series of The X-Factor has just begun and yes, I've been watching the first episode because - - oh, look, I just have, okay?

They said that they'd had a record number of people entering this year - 180,000. (Of whom, if this first episode is to be believed, approximately 179,982 couldn't sing).

So - - 180,000 people. And say they each get three minutes in front of the panel. That's twenty of them an hour. So if we divide by twenty we'll get the number of hours it would take to audition them all. At a conservative estimate.

So180,000 divided by 20 = 9000 hours.

So if the panel auditioned people for, say, eight hours a day we have:

9000 divided by 8 = 1,125 days.

So, since the last series of The X-Factor finished at Christmas the panel have spent 1,125 days auditioning people. No wonder they look a bit tired.

But hey! Wait a minute! There haven't been 1,125 days since Christmas!

Can it be that there's something going on that we're not being told about?

And if there is, I think we should be told. Because whoever wins this (and my money's currently on the single mother with five children because she's attractive and feisty with a great voice and a sob story as well) is going to have the Christmas No. 1, because they always do.

It will be called Rushing to the Light and it will go like this:

Oh in the clouds before this had begun
My life was lost and I had never won
And now I've found you everything's all right
I'm in the sunshine not the darkest night

For this is me now, everything's come true
I'm feeling bright where I was feeling blue
My heart is beating harder now today
I'm rushing to the light, I'm on my way

Well, if it's not exactly like that, I tell you now it will be very similar. Anyone want to sign me up?


Blogger Silverback said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

10:44 pm  
Blogger Silverback said...

I'll try and spell things right this time !!

Speaking of maths,which I could see Simon struggling with, she is a single mother with 5 kids.... and is 26 years old. Her oldest kid is 13.

Hmmmm feisty isn't the first word that comes to mind.

10:47 pm  
Blogger Daphne said...

Interesting that it was presented as though the 5 kids had just kind of happened to her, as part of her lot in life. Perhaps Simon Cowell will explain to her what causes them.

11:01 pm  

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