Have You Got Your Coat On?

Like every mother before me and all those who will come after, I waste a lot of time in fruitless discussion of outer garments.

“Emily, it’s freezing out there! Have you got your coat on?”

“No, Mum. Byeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” and the door closes and off she goes.

“Emily, are you taking a jumper to school? There’s frost on the ground.”

“No, Mum. Byeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” and the door closes and off she goes.

“”Emily, have you got your waterproof? Because it’s snowing and there are penguins on the lawn.”

“No, Mum. Byeeeeeeeeeeeee!” and the door closes - - - -

So my delight can only be imagined when Emily asked for some money to go to town yesterday to buy some warm jumpers for winter. Delight, and astonishment.

Of course she took Gareth with her, presumably as some kind of punishment for any past or future crimes. He has but a slim grasp of female clothes shopping, poor man, and it was with some surprise that he related to me what happened.

“Look, Gareth. Trousers!”

“But we’re not here to look at the trousers. We’re here to buy jumpers.”

“Yes, but I like trousers too. Which do you like? I’m going to try these on.”

“But aren’t you looking for - - ?”

“Scarves over there, look, let’s see. Do you like this one or this one?”

“But we’re not here to buy scarves, we’re here to buy jumpers.”

“Yes, but if I was going to buy a scarf, should it be this one or this one?”

“Neither, because we’re here to buy jump - - “

“I think this one, don’t you. Oooh! HATS!”

She came back with a grey V-neck jumper and a red hoodie with stars on and they both really suit her.

Gareth and Emily have both given permission for me to write this anecdote: Gareth because he feels it gives some insight into the dark and strange workings of the female mind, and Emily because she feels it explains the processes that are needed to achieve the correct purchases.

Whether you are male or female, I trust you will find this information useful.